Essay on Arrange Marriage vs. Love Marriage
Marriage is an institution that is considered successful, if, it lasts lifelong. There are different customs and traditions that are followed in different societal set-ups. In Indian society, arranged marriages are known to exist since ages. The structure of the Indian society is built up in such a way that first preference is given to the family values and the individual's choice follows after. Respect towards elders and the conservative mind set paves the way for arranged marriages. Women are generally restricted to the boundaries of homes environ and are prohibited to move independently in the society. Therefore, it becomes almost impossible for them to search a groom on their own. Otherwise also, girl's consent is not considered compulsory in orthodox society. Even the young boys are also expected to mutely follow the decision taken by elders related to their marriage.
On the other hand Love marriages are considered more of as western influence. Though, the concept is now acceptable in the modern societal set ups but it is still not embraced heartedly in rural parts of the country. Love marriage is more acceptable and comprehensible to the modern generation. It helps the duo to know each other well, before taking the crucial decision of life. But independence covets highest degree of responsibility also. On one hand, love marriages grants the opportunity to choose the partner but the responsibility of choosing the right person is also laid on the shoulders of the couple only. In arranged marriages, the burden and responsibility of choosing the right person is shared by elders of the family. Hence, in times of need family stand by and help to resolve any conflict or crisis situation. Any such cover or support is generally missing in love marriage.
When the two unknown individuals come together to tie the nuptial knots, they don't have any expectations from each other. Knowing and understanding each other takes a significant duration of time. And during this period they learn to compromise and accept each other as they are. But in case of love marriage there are higher expectations from both the sides. Though, the couple does possess an advantage of knowing each other but the circumstances and responsibilities change after marriage. Many couples find it hard to adapt to the changing scenario and expect the things to move in the same direction as they were before marriage. This is one of the main reasons that later lead to unjustified and unreasonable demands put up by both the sides.
Though, surviving an arranged marriage is even tougher. In love marriage, the two individuals can easily sail through tough times if they have real faith in each other. They are well aware about the qualities and shortcomings of each other. Hence, can easily predict and control the behaviour. In arranged marriages, any such advantage is missing. Most of the times, it is the newly-wed bride who has to suffer the most. And ultimately the relationship suffers.
There are no sure shot rules for a successful marriage. Neither are there any set methods that guarantee 100% success rate. Yet the debate about whether arrange marriage or love marriage is better than the other will last for times to come. The modern Indian society is in a state of transition. New customs are embraced by the youth readily but the age old customs and family values are still a priority in our society. Therefore, a new genre of love cum arranged marriages has emerged, which is a perfect blend of the two worlds.
Arranged marriage is better
In my view arranged marriages are better than love marriage. In love marriages partners are trying to impress each other, they are not ready to share their weaknesses. Problems occur when the partner doesn't like to accept their weaknesses after the marriage. So a love marriage will be successful when both understand each other.
In arranged marriages, parents choose our partners. I think they know what is good to their children. Here two persons with different attitudes, mentalities and goals are committed to live together. So they will respect their partner's choice. So I think most of the arranged marriages are successful.
Yes, they are more stable.
An arranged marriage is one in which there are not all the grand expectations that there are when love is involved. Love can often let you down, whereas an arranged marriage is based on expectations that are reasonable. An arranged marriage reflects the actual idea that marriage is a contract and both parties know what to expect from the other. It's not often that arranged marriages result in the kind of madly in love type of relationships, but they usually do have a settled and loving bond with each other that works.
Arrange marriages last!!!!
I am voting for a different type of arranged marriage a new version not this old school rubbish that goes around where the daughter or son has no say! They should be involved more so than anyone but i guess my point is both parties are supposed to love via logic not emotion. Traditional love is all based on endorphins in your body and chemical reactions, for example if person looks "hot" to what society brands the girl will look for someone who looks "hot and probably fall in love even though thy dont get along and then they split up. Why do we have so many rates of separations! The girl was the one who continued the relationship! Cause that girl chose the guy based on lust and not logic, we have this pressure from society in that you have to fall in love the ideal partner. Too many marriages are based on lust no a days and i guess the best way to put it is love should be about logic, respect, compatibility compassion. The girl should be READY not THINK she is ready. So many love relationship fall out. I have seen arranged marriages last way longer but there are cons in this as well!!!! The new way of arranged marriages is different than what North Americans think. Two families raise there kids and already plan that the children would marry, they give them exposure to each other and encourage them to gain experiences so the love is actually built , once being put through the years they "fall in love" but this was already arranged from the beginning. Hence arranged marriage, instead of some one being single finding someone and then getting married at random. I guess my post should be for love but in my opinion getting your parents or your friends to arrange someone for you is better they know what you want, you dont get hurt and waste time and become someone's love experience
Made in heaven.
Arrange marriage is made in heaven as the parents will find the perfect match for me and my family. Respect and true love between the couples. Thrilling moments. Its like hidden treasure and more you explore about your partner strengthen the love, understanding, feeling and relationship. Long lasting true relationship.
It has a foundation
You see, people now find ways to be "strong" for their loved one. But that's not how it goes. Being strong for that one person is simply by showing that you know their weaknesses and flaws. You do know that it's really hard to accept the fact that we people have weaknesses, but we need to accept it of we really love someone, and that's hard.
Good in some societies bad in others
Arranged marriage is good in some societies while it is bad in some other societies. It is good in some societies because it is following the religious customs, it is a sign of honor and respect to the families involved and it is the culture of the community. It is bad in some communities because someone has no right to marry who he or she loves, it is discriminating and it does not matter if the parties involved are happy.
I believe in any marriage.
Nothing is better than anything.
It's what you believe in!
I come from a place where arranged marriage is very common.
So I believe in both.
But I'm going to have a love marriage!
Because I'm in love with someone who I truly love <3
It would be tough for me but I'm willing to take the risk to live with someone I want.
I believe that love marriage is better
Love marriage is better than arrange marriage. Well know who have an idea about love they always choose love and coordinate with parents also. An another question that is parents choose best just see his/ her face, family, economic condition without internal views. I request the youth to crack out the bad culture.
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Think About Context
Although many of us live in first world countries such as America, Canada, etc. I would like to inform you that the way things are done in some countries are different than ours. On the con side, people had stated suicide and depression and also marrying older men. It is a hard concept for us to grasp, but in countries such as India, this is none but the norm. We think: "Oh, gee that must be nasty, that 15 year old marrying that 45 year old man!" But coming out of the 15 year old girl's background knowledge, what's so nasty about it?
I believe in arranged marriages.
Expectations that aren't met can fall something apart. In marriage, expectations aren't really that bad, in fact, it can be a good step to start the marriage. But couple tend to depend on their expectations. They expect loyalty, perfection, desire, passion and solutions to all the problems they will encounter. Their marriage will break down continually if expectations aren't me because it could be a total shock for them. Expectations are a slippery slope; when one expectations aren't, it can cause disruption to the other.
Arranged marriage does not work that way because they have less expectations from their marriage and so they will have time to be curious and understand each each, build their marriage and build their love.